There are 850,000 people living with dementia in the UK and the numbers are set to rise rapidly as our population ages. According to the Alzheimer’s Society unpaid carers supporting someone with dementia save the economy a staggering £11 billion every year.
Caring for someone who has dementia can be a challenging experience. It is common for carers to feel frustrated and guilty. Many carers feel they’re not doing a good job but it’s really important to remember that there is no such thing as a ‘perfect carer’.
Looking after someone with dementia
As dementia progresses there are some things which can help manage day to day living.
- If communication becomes challenging you might find simple things like using shorter sentences can help. Some great tips from the NHS here.
- Keeping your house dementia friendly can also make life easier – and help you worry less. For example, have good lighting and try things like brightly coloured cloths and towels. Useful tips from the NHS here.
- You also may want to think about ways to keep the person you care for safe. On the Carers UK site, read James’s account of the items that helped when he supported his mother
Looking after yourself
People often say that receiving a dementia diagnosis for a loved one is an enormous shock but it’s important to remember that people with dementia can continue living well. However it’s crucial that you take care of yourself too and make sure you are accessing everything you need.
- Eating well, getting enough sleep and exercise will all keep you feeling more positive about your situation. But if you do find you’re struggling it might be worth speaking to your GP.
- It can be particularly tiring caring for someone with dementia, especially as their condition progresses. Try to priorities all the tasks you need to do. What’s most important? What can you pass to others? Is there anything you can just not do? Acknowledge you are just one person. Help is out there, please ask us.
- Getting practical things sorted – like looking into an Attendance Allowance, having a Carers Assessment done, and registering with your GP as a carer – will ensure you are accessing the support you’re entitled to.
Find out more about looking after yourself here.
Free Surrey monitoring service for people with dementia and their carers
There’s a free service, from Surrey NHS and Surrey County Council, that will monitor the health of your loved one, automatically flagging any concerns, putting you directly in touch with the appropriate help, when needed. Read all about it and how to get referred here.
Being the carer for someone with dementia can have additional emotional affects, particularly as the person you care for seems to change. You may feel a range of emotions – guilt, sadness, frustration, anger. But these are common feelings. Many others will feel the same as you, don’t feel bad about feeling them, but do try understand exactly why you’re feeling this way, and find out how to deal with your feelings.
Action for Carers can talk to you and advise on further sources of support. You could also talk to your GP, social worker or counsellor, or a close friend or understanding family member. Talking to other carers can really help – why not consider attending one of our dementia support groups?
It’s especially important to try and look after yourself, and find some time, even if it’s short, to do things you enjoy.
Support from Action for Carers
We can talk to you about your caring situation and suggest ways to help, let you know about ACS events and support groups, as well as signpost you on to further sources of help, from the council. NHS and other charities and community groups.
We have support groups running regularly across Surrey, including some just for carers of people with dementia. It’s a chance to talk to others who understand, and share tips and advice. They are very relaxed, informal get-togethers – held at places like local cafes or garden centres. We’re now holding them by video on Zoom, so you can join in without leaving home. Find out about our support groups here.
If you can’t get to a group, but can get on line, you may find the Alzheimer’s Society’s ‘Talking Point’ useful. It’s a forum for people to chat, and has dedicated sections called ‘I care for a person with dementia’ and ‘I have a partner with dementia’. Both are very active and may be useful to you if caring for someone with Alzheimer’s or dementia.
We often run events for carers of people with dementia or Alzheimer’s, such as information days or workshops, usually with guest speakers.
We also have general events that may help you, about looking after yourself as a carer, and social activities. Take a look at all our upcoming events.
Information and signposting
We can give you information and signpost you to other sources of support. A key source of support is Alzheimer’s UK’s Surrey arm.
Dementia charity Alzheimer’s Society works to challenge perceptions, fund research and improve care and support. Too many families are facing dementia alone and we urgently need to improve care, offer help and understanding and find new treatments. There are over 16,200 people living with dementia in Surrey. Whoever you are, whatever you are going through, you can turn to Alzheimer’s Society for support help and advice. Alzheimer’s Society is active across Surrey in Elmbridge, Epsom and Ewell, Farnham, Guildford, Mole Valley, Reigate and Banstead, Runnymede, Spelthorne, Surrey Heath, Tandridge, Waverley and Woking.
Alzheimer’s Society offers Dementia Connect; a personalised dementia support service:
Dementia Connect is a free personalised service that connects anyone affected by dementia to the support they need, when they need it. Not just people with dementia but their carers, family and friends too. Specialist Dementia Advisers provide direct support as well as signposting. We know it’s never easy to tell your story. That’s why we only ever ask you to tell it once.
For further information and local support call 0333 150 3456.
Support line opening hours
Monday – Wednesday 9:00am – 8:00pm
Thursday – Friday: 9:00am – 5:00pm
Saturday – Sunday: 10:00am – 4:00pm
Self-referrals are also accepted via telephone 0333 150 3456 and Dementia Connect Self referral
Time for Dementia – is an award-winning educational programme designed to create healthcare professionals who are more aware and understanding of dementia. The Society always need more families to participate in this vital training; please get in touch with them to find out more.
Carers’ Trust guide
Carers’ Trust publish a helpful guide for carers of people with dementia.
m4d radio for people living with dementia
There’s a special radio station for people living with dementia and their carers. m4d radio is available 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, playing music that evokes memories. You simply choose your era, listen and enjoy.
Runnymede dementia-friendly days out
If you live in or near Runnymede, this lovely calendar gives suggestions of things to do and places to visit that are dementia (and carer!) friendly.